I have always been in love with hearing (sharing?) stories >>
- stories about the animal kingdom that I heard at my grandfather’s house;
- stories about our families that I swapped with my best friends in secondary school;
- stories about romantic relationships that I swapped with my college friends, intertwined with stories about Russian, Italian and American history that I heard from my professors;
- stories about real life that I heard at my first job;
- stories about companies navigating growth and going bust that I heard in business school; and
- stories that change and shape lives that I heard at the feet of my mom and my aunties.
The reasons for this blog is simple:
1. | I have always loved women, women’s issues and womanhood – I love Nigerian/African women; like colored women of all geographies our strength and craziness is matchless, and like women everywhere, we are complicated AF. So I was continuously and increasingly frustrated by the plastic and single archetype of the Nigerian/African woman that I kept coming across. I didn’t recognize her because she is one dimensional, and bears no resemblance to the women that I know. The women I know are complex AF, multifaceted, cannot be taken in in 6 months, never mind several minutes. We are confusing, confused, walking contradictions. AND I wanted to create a platform where our stories can be told.
2. | I have always had a heart for the women behind me… This is for them, so that they know that they are not weird, alone, lost, helpless, hopeless >> that they know the power that they wield >> that they never second guess themselves, that they stand firmly in their truth, that they understand their beauty (physical, internal, emotional, mental, spiritual).
3. | It is also for my goddaughters and for my daughters unborn >> whenever I see a picture of my mom where she was between the ages of 19 and 29 (I came in her 30th year – OMG, I just realized that my mom must have found out about her pregnancy with me, just a month after she turned 30 >> can you imagine a more perfect gift); when I see pictures of her I always wonder, what was she thinking, was she happy, what were her views about the world, her place in it, what was she excited about, worried about, what were her dreams for the future, does the woman I know today, remember the woman in the picture? I think it is important for us to have deep and real conversations with the women that we love, who came before us and who come after us, to ask them not to sugarcoat things, not to think about propriety or concepts like shame, to speak the truth. O, the depth and richness of these conversations.
4. | I started this site because I never knew I had any creative ability until I started sharing my writing on my private IG page. I think we are all writers, definitely all storytellers, the thing is that not all of us are willing to be vulnerable and pour out our hearts. This is a place for me to develop this craft and to connect with all of you >> I respect that privilege, I will cherish it.
It is a place for my world view to be challenged and expanded by your experiences and opinion. It is a respectful community.
5. | This site is here because it wanted to be. It consumed me for 18 months, pounding at my seams. It would not be appeased, not until it was birthed.
Maya Angelou said that we should gather in her name, it is my greatest desire that this is the place where you will choose to gather, I hope that when you do, you will come away feeling like you have been hugged by a friend who really cares about you.
Thanks for reading! I am really glad you came.